It was funny, I was listening to What Happened to You? Conservations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing by Dr. Perry and Oprah, and one small phrase had me wracking my brain, and making new connections.
The Line was, “We are healers”. An Indigenous healer from New Zealand had told Doctor Perry this when he was working in a clinic there. Originally, he thought the woman was talking about the two of them. Later, he came to understand that the woman was talking about the community.
When I heard this story, my brain lit up. I immediately thought of our innate ability to heal ourselves. Of course, we are all healers! Of course, everyone has the capability to heal and help others heal because that is what people do. They heal. They form community and help their people through struggles. It doesn’t matter if you have a doctor in front of your name or certifications.
Humans have the ability to heal and therefore are healers. If we get a cut, our cells will form a scab, the scab will fall off and leave our skin healed. We all have this ability. So after this wonderful realization made e critically analyze what being a healer really means.
I take pride in my abilities as a healer. What do I really mean when I say healer then? I came to one logical answer. My job as a healer is to help facilitate growth and change the old patterns keeping people in pain. Essentially, I am a highly trained tour guide as the person sitting in front me heals themselves.
I unconsciously was still attributing my identity to being able to heal people. When I found out that didn’t make me special, I took a deep dive into my ego. This was the first time I really knew, in my heart, that I am a compassionate, loving and kind tour guide. Doesn’t matter what letters come after my name. I am not THE healer.
My self-worth isn’t wrapped up in what I can do for people. My self-worth stems from who I am as a human being; kind, compassionate, sarcastic, spicy, playful, intelligent, wise, and so many more beautiful qualities. This was another layer of my trauma physiology and mentality coming up to be healed.
High functioning over achievers and perfectionists run the limiting belief that I am valued for what I can provide and do for others. Cancel, Cancel, cancel that non-sense. I am valued for who I am!
A lot of stress released that I was still carrying around unconsciously. It is not my responsibility to heal the world. It is my responsibility to guide and train people to more effective healers so they can continue to heal themselves.
I cannot make someone heal. I cannot force anyone to do anything they don’t want to do. I can facilitate and help them with different tools that will make them kickass healers. This means that my patients and clients need to step up for themselves. Take back what they are actively trying to project on me.
They need to step into being their own healer. I need to better facilitate their growth, motivate them to be an active participant in their healing, bring awareness to their amazing value, she light on their self-worth that they have forgotten and stand in their magnificence when they can’t see it for themselves. That job description is a very different one than healer.
What just shifted for you? What do I need to know? What questions do you have? Book in a Zoom tea and let’s discuss! I would love to hear what you have to say!
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